DRONA or Ultimate RONA

I know I am dumb. I know I suck. But still why do I have to prove it again and again. This time around I proved it in a fuckin real retarded and idiotic way. So, you want to know how, huh? I watched D-Rona no that dash is not an error, the damn movie should have been named D-RONA, why u ask me cuz u will cry after u see it, you will cry from the pains of loosing your hard earned money. OH! Did I forget that you gotta have real guts to watch it in a theatre, inflicting a lot of pain on your damn ass for 2 hours. Yeah your ass will pain even if you watch it in a fuckin GOLD CLASS seats at FAME. You can trust me this time at least.

So even after reading this you don’t believe me, right? So I will become a real spoilsport and tell u the whole damn fuckin story( please accept my apologies for using the F WORD but, I am so damn pissed even thinking about the shitty movie that I just could not control my emotions .)

Come the first scene and you see a kid being scared by a nightmare (read Harry Potter living with Durseley’s minus uncle Vernon) come the next frame and u see a blue petal flying in through the window and the kind uncle Vernon (yeah right uncle Vernon is not mean in Indian version) says that the blasted boy is ‘SPECIAL’. I mean does he have a tail on his damn arse that makes him special. Come second frame and you see a full grown DRONA being bullied by a skinny and super cool Dudley (yeah who says that the movie is a rip off of many Hollywood movies). Poor uncle Vernon is dead by now. I think now the SPECIAL retarded hero will realize why he is so special apart from being an asshole. No but he still does not realize it. Come third frame and u see our own pathetic version of the LORD VOLDEMORT. ‘RIZ RAIZADA’ or some weird name, that too with an army of death eaters. Now, if I would have been Che I would have named him WTF villain but no, I will stick to RIZ I don’t want to write an adult post after all. I don’t really know why he wore a shitty makeup because; he was not looking scary at all. OH! But were they trying to make him look funny but, he was not even funny he was plainly creepy. Now RIZ is supposed to be an ASUR (“demon” for noobs) who is in search of AMRUT (A Famous Drink that’s supposed to make the drinker immortal, no u dirty mind it does not get u high) and our moron superhero is the protector of the place. And no, no that’s not all in come our lady Rajnikant or wait is it lady Mithun, Whatever I say, and our hero finds out after meeting her that he really is famous. Throw in some firang protectors or wait are they the priory of sion protecting the best kept secret on earth , who speak damn funny Hindi with weird accents which sounds funny even if the moment of the delivery is supposed to be dead serious. By this time I was planning to move on but no wait, the brave person I am, I decided to wait and watch the whole damn movie. One more proof against my innocence. And yeah this female Rajnikant can drive like she is racing for stakes against Vin diesel, fight the death eaters better than Hermione and what not. SHIT! Did I forget that every sentence that she starts has to begin with “Bauji Kehte The”. That’s ok with me I say as far as she gets kicks from saying whatever she feels, none of my business. Then throw in a weird looking colorful place with a even weirder name. OH! And a Strong guy with horns, bad teeth and chains around the neck, who is knocked off in one punch, strange I say. And finally the limit is a horse which would be better known as a bag of bones. No, no wait its supposed to be the fastest steed on the whole damn earth and what’s more is that it runs faster than air and no one can control it except our moron Drona. I mean seriously the horse looks as if it will fall down with malnutrition in a minute. No, no its still not over or wait I think I am done already I cant think more and feel guilty of being a retard. I will stop the torture now. PEACE with all ye fellows. But just one question, what do you get if you mix Harry Potter, some Fast and Furious, Da Vinci Code, Mummy, train chasing scene from Sholay, and colorful background from Gajagamini (for those who’ve forgotten, it was a movie by MF Hussein) Yeah, damn fuckin Right D-Rona.


So, now why don’t you just go to the nearest theatre and watch the damn movie. I am dying to get this RETARD shit off my head.

Adios.