On Why I Am Single.

Be funny, and sarcastic.
Remember that great line by Nevada Smith from Carpetbaggers about how a gun is like your second cock? Well my girl did not. It was not that she was not a fan of Erotic novel writer but, she was not into reading at all.
Remember those Shitty humorous jokes about ‘how to kill babies’? She didn’t know those either. But if told those goddamn jokes to her, she would always remind me how gore my thoughts can be.
Women love a guy with a sense of humor, but they hate a guy who really knows how to laugh, don’t they.

Huh, huh... shut up, Kurtnirvana
The more you suppress those laughs when an old codger falls off, or sit stoned while when someone says the F word, the more your woman will love you.
They love a bit of fake sophistication, it depends on you how you don’t fall for that trap. Mentioning how funny you think CHE is will only have her fall more in love with you. I don’t really know what’s wrong with these girls. The next time with your fake sophistication you might just find yourself a DVD of Miss Congeniality as your birthday gift. :P
Next time you’re out at a fine restaurant, suffering through another of her birthday parties, and the waiter asks you what you’d like, just reply, “It’s Fuckin Falooda Time!” And make sure all the other guys in the restaurant can hear what you say, because they’ll be laughing their balls out but, on the inside. Try rescuing those poor guys. Tell them the truth, tell them all they need is counseling.